Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Warning: Long Post; No Picture

I really haven't written about a recent event in my life. Now I feel that it is time to get it all down on paper, I mean, type it on the computer. And just put it out there.

In Oct. 2005, our family took a huge leap of faith and moved across the country, to the Midwest. I had lived only a handful of places, all in the same state, for the first 30 years of my life. Soon after the move, I think in less than a week, I had a friend. I met her at my church. She came over to meet me with a few other women, I was distant; I was unsure; but she was there.

Later she called me and I put her off. I was busy, filling my time with nothing. I was lonely and lost. She called again and with a little hesitation, we got our girls together to play. My girls could make friends, but I really didn't need one, I thought. Soon we started getting together A LOT, having our girls play a couple of afternoons a week. Our husbands also had jobs that required working late into the night. We would set up meals together, and late-nights to work on our scrapbooks, or just watch a movie, recent TV show, or just talk. I needed her. She listened and understood me. I was a night owl, and loved to make runs to Target, or other stores after the kids went to bed. She would come with me, we laughed, we were there for one another.

She saved me.

I really didn't know what it was going to be like when I moved away from friends and family that I was so close to. I was sometimes even bitter, I didn't think that at my age I needed to be making new friends, like my children were. I had all my close-knit friends at home. But now this was home. I needed someone, and she was there. Now as I sit here with tears, tears of true sadness. My friend is not coming back. Last summer, she moved, at the time, for good. But then, they still had a house here, and for most of the year, I thought she could be coming back. A glimmer of hope. But she is not. For the past few weeks, I have been trying to really understand, and to be strong. I have not felt sadness, but happiness for her new life adventure.

Now this might be selfish, but maybe she was put here, just for me. Just for what I needed. Just to be my friend, when I thought I didn't need one, but I did; yes, I did.
Last Friday, I was alone in my car, listening to my favorite CD and a song came on that made me instantly think of her. Because I was alone, I wept. I pulled over and just cried. Sometimes you just need a good cry. For clarity, for understanding, or just for sadness. I am truly grateful for my friend. For her place in my life. Even with being only a phone call away now, she was there in the beginning. The beginning of a journey that has made me a little stronger, and a little weaker at the same time. She is what you call a true friend.
I usually don't get this deep, or this emotional, on this little blog of mine. I know that there are many other stressful events happening all around the world. And having a friend move away, might be so small compared to others life experiences. But I needed to say it, I needed it here. Maybe it will help me be just a little kinder, a little more understanding, or just get me to go see someone that may need a friend too.


  1. This describes, perfectly, how I felt moving out here. And then in turn meeting certain people that have changed my life! I am so sorry they aren't coming back, they are a great family!

  2. Now didn't you JUST complain about too much talk and no pictures on blogs?? LOL!

  3. True Friend
    by Barbara Lynn Terry

    When you are feeling so afraid
    there is always one who can save the day
    someone you called today
    and told you, "I am on my way."

    This person listened and heard what you had to say
    and didn't grunt and groan and hang up the phone
    but calmed you down by saying "I am on my way"
    and these words calmed your fears away.

    There are many like this person in the world
    who will laugh, dance, and twirl
    across the danceroom floor of life
    to help you chase away all the strife
    that has made you miserable and sad.

    Who is this person that is so dear to all of us?
    Who is it that waited as we stepped off of the bus?
    Who is this person who hugged and showed us they cared?
    Who is this person who makes us unaware?
    Who is this person who comes to your rescue,
    with only thoughts of urgency for you?

    We call this person at the days end,
    our one and only
    true friend.

  4. Si I sent that one, cuz I couldn't find the one I was really looking for... when I find it, I'll forward that too! :) Hang in there hon.

    It is good you appreciated her, but there is a reason and a time for her coming... it is so hard to let go of the "day to day" friend. But you'll be blessed in the future too. :)

  5. I know you two were very close, and I am bummed thay they are not moving back too. I did know Jamie very well, but she alwyas made me feel included and welcome. They were a great family!

  6. I feel for you, Kim! I've been there...and I've been the one to move away. Either way, it's not easy. I'm sure a little part of your heart went with her. Friends like that don't come along very many times in this life. Cherish her and your friendship!

  7. Oh Kim, this is so precious! What a friend you still have...I was crying when I was reading this. Just remember you still have us scrap divas here haha!

  8. Kim- I felt so bad when I was reading this yesterday. All the time I was reading about how you described Jamie and everything she was for you as a friend, I could also see YOU as that very person. You are an amazing friend and I'm sure have touched many more people's lives in this way than you even imagine. Hang in there, I wish I lived closer ; )

    What a great song too..

  9. such an awesome post! I totally know how you feel. Believe it or not, you were that friend to me when I was all alone in Iowa almost 10 years ago. Our "morning devotionals" over e-mail (what a radical and new thing it was back then) from Principal to Purolator really got me through some lonely times in the good ole' midwest. Thanks for being that friend to me when I was so afraid and lonely I didn't think I could make it through another day. I wish I was there to give you a give hug. Love you!

  10. Kim, this is the kind of experience I hoped you'd have when you moved to Iowa--well, the making friends that become like family part, not the friends moving away on you part. I've been the one moving and the one left behind--it's all bittersweet. Keep looking for that kind of friendship though--it'll come again.


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